Twenty-eight years ago this past Saturday, I committed my life to Paul Hallie-Victor Haas in marriage.  I am so thankful that I did.  Paul is my beloved and my friend. (Song of Solomon 5:16) He is my one and only.  Our marriage has been filled with joy and suffering, like any marriage.  Many years ago, I asked Paul what spice would best describe our marriage and he said cayenne pepper. Wowza!  I agreed. We are both spicy by nature in all the best and worst ways.  That spiciness coupled with sin is a bad combination, however that spiciness coupled with serving is beautiful.  There are many words that describe marriage, but I think the most fitting is the word SERVING.  Over these years, Paul and I have served each other well and we have served each other poorly.  When our posture is of SERVING one another as unto the Lord, we do well and when it isn’t, we don’t.  I want to serve Paul as unto the Lord. Colossians 3:23-24 says, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.”  When I serve Paul as unto the Lord, I am serving Jesus.  When I serve my children as unto the Lord, I am serving Jesus. When I do anything as unto the Lord, I am serving Jesus. This is amazing!

Today we will continue our focus on Romans 12:9-11 which says, “Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit,serve the Lord.” What does this look like in the context of marriage as that is what’s on my mind today?

1. Serve the Lord and let love be genuine. What does this look like in marriage? It’s loving Paul as described below. 

I Corinthians 13:4-5 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

2. Serve the Lord and abhor what is evil. What does this look like in marriage? It’s hating the evil in me first and foremost and before hating the evil in Paul. I want to take the log out of my eye before looking at the speck in his. It’s thanking the Lord for saving me, trusting that just as much as the Lord is working in my life, He is at work in Paul’s.

Matthew 7:5 First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

3. Serve the Lord and hold fast to what is good.  What does this look like marriage? It’s holding fast to Christ, not Paul.  I don’t want to be a clingy wife.  I have been that and it’s not a pretty picture.  

Deuteronomy 10:20 You shall fear the Lord your God; you shall serve Him and cling to Him, and you shall swear by His name.

4. Serve the Lord and love one another with brotherly affection. What does this look like in marriage? I not only love Paul because he is my husband, but I love him because he is my brother in Christ.  We are part of the same family.

Galatians 3:28 says, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

5. Serve the Lord and outdo one another in showing honor.  What does this in marriage? It means I take the lead and say I am sorry.  It means I take the lead and run to the door and hug this man that God gave me after a long day of being apart.  It means I take the lead in building him up and encouraging him. It means I take the lead and initiate dates. I don’t wait for Paul, I lead out in showing honor.  Guess what? When I actually do this, we do better and we mutually lead out together :)

I Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

6. Serve the Lord and do not be slothful in zeal.  What does this mean in marriage? It means that I am not lazy and lukewarm in my marriage.  I am sad to admit that I have been like this far too often :(. I want to abound in the work of the Lord serving Him by steering clear of this kind of an attitude.  There is no room for it in Christ.

I Corinthians 15:58 “Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.” 

7. Serve the Lord and be fervent in spirit.  What does this look like in marriage? It means that I first love the Lord and know who He is and then love myself, not in a sinful, center of the world kind of way, but in a way that honors the Lord as I call to mind who I am in Christ, and third I love my neighbor.  Who is my closest neighbor?  Paul.  Oh, may I serve the Lord by being fervent in Spirit as I love my Paul.

Matthew 22:37-39 “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

8. Serve the Lord and serve the LORD! What does this look like marriage? It means I serve Paul best by serving my Savior and I serve my Savior best by serving Paul. 

Deuteronomy 13:4 You shall walk after the Lord your God and fear Him and keep His commandments and obey His voice, and you shall serve Him and hold fast to Him.

Psalm 100:2 Serve the Lord with gladness! Come into His presence with singing!

Colossians 3:23-24 Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.”

In closing, I received a couple of comments on ‘boiling for Christ’ coupled with resting.  Can you ‘boil for Christ’ or be ‘fervent in Spirit’ when resting?  My answer is “YES!!!”  We are called to rest.  We can’t be working and doing all the time, however in that resting we can still be fervent in spirit.  I also think of my dad who can’t walk, who struggles to hear, who cannot project his voice anymore, who has little strength, who is completely disabled due to Parkinson’s Disease, and who is one of the most ‘fervent in spirit’ people I know.  Even in this, he continues to serve the Lord by boiling for Christ in his compromised state.

Blessings to you as you serve Him,

Heather

If you are following along with When You pray, here is the weekly outline for the week:  If you want more information or have questions, let me know.  

Each day pray for yourself, spouse, and children.

Monday – Pray for your immediate family.

Tuesday – Pray for your church.

Wednesday – Pray for your extended family.

Thursday – Pray for your spouse’s extended family.

Friday – Pray for your friends.

3rd Saturday – Pray for families who have prodigals, pray for those struggling morally

3rd Sunday – Pray for your County Government Officials

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